In my current exploratory research into ambiguous grief, it has become very clear, very quickly, that there is another type of grief that is just as important as the four previously identified types of ambiguous grief: Divorce, Disclosure, Diagnosis, and Death of a Relationship. This 5th ‘Big D’ is Disappointment.
Betrayal trauma occurs when we are wounded by someone we have come to trust. When we put faith into another person to be there for us, especially to love us, our hearts and our minds come to recognize them as safe. They can be trusted with our feelings. When that trust is broken the pain can be devastating, and even traumatic. Read more Betrayal Trauma
My husband is a sex addict. Do I need to worry if he might sexually abuse our children?
As a CSAT, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, working primarily with Partners, in the early stages of their recovery, I regularly get asked by my Partner clients if the children are in danger from their father who is a sex addict. This question is asked from a place of recent trauma, intense fear, and complete mistrust of the husband/addict, who is also the person who the Partner loves/loved and trusted very deeply. Likely, before finding out about sexual infidelities and addiction invading the relationship, the thought of her husband abusing children was never a concern. In my experience, this is a fair question in a therapeutic setting, so the client can learn more about what sex addiction is, and in turn, what is sex-offending behavior. So, it is very important to know that only approximately 10% of sex addicts are also sex offenders.
Read more My husband’s a sex addict. Do I need to worry about our children?